Omtjigkom Nurlbogmig Yargess is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, omnipotent fairy.

Omtjigkom Nurlbogmig Yargess created the Sol system two million years ago.

If you believe in Omtjigkom Nurlbogmig Yargess, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Omtjigkom Nurlbogmig Yargess, it will turn you into a frog.

Omtjigkom Nurlbogmig Yargess' most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Omtjigkom Nurlbogmig Yargess' Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Omtjigkom Nurlbogmig Yargess loves sharks, so they must be honoured.

5. Never paint your feet white.