Dumlibbit is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, astonishing badger.

Dumlibbit created Asia six million years ago.

If you believe in Dumlibbit, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Dumlibbit, it will boil you in a big pot.

Dumlibbit's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Dumlibbit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about figs.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never skip near tortoises.

5. Never eat bark.