Nellanjop is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, compassionate armadillo.

Nellanjop created snails four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nellanjop, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Nellanjop, she will turn you into a tree.

Nellanjop's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Nellanjop's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry sharks.

2. Never go into cyan rooms.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.