Zakhadsaf is a god.

She takes the form of a small, uncaring hyena.

Zakhadsaf created life eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Zakhadsaf, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Zakhadsaf, she will refuse to believe in you.

Zakhadsaf's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Zakhadsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Zakhadsaf's name in vain.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Always help swans.

4. Erect six silver sculptures of Zakhadsaf on top of important buildings.

5. Never feed limes to seals while wearing red scarves.