Hinbammin is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, humorless penguin.

Hinbammin created a top quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hinbammin, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Hinbammin, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Hinbammin's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Hinbammin's Holy Commandments

1. Hinbammin loves foxes, so they must be honoured.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Do not sit in public.

4. Never paint your legs purple.

5. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Hinbammin on top of all buildings.