Cimbadmis is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, irritating turtle.

Cimbadmis created the cosmos seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Cimbadmis, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cimbadmis, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Cimbadmis' most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Cimbadmis' Holy Commandments

1. Never skip near mites.

2. Pray towards the south.

3. Never bounce in holy places.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never eat bark.