Vogflislipflat is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, vain coyote.

Vogflislipflat created the Cigar Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vogflislipflat, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vogflislipflat, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Vogflislipflat's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Vogflislipflat's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate hamsters.

2. Never run in the presence of frogs.

3. Never feed cherries to turtles while wearing purple tights.

4. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a room before entering it.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.