Witcinzag is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, charitable narwhal.

Witcinzag created the planet Venus five million years ago.

If you believe in Witcinzag, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Witcinzag, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Witcinzag's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Witcinzag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear iron on your body.

2. Run away from purple swans, for they are unholy.

3. Do not drink water in violet rooms.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Put Witcinzag first in all things.