Flambetzak is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, bad-tempered dryad.

Flambetzak created viruses nine million years ago.

If you believe in Flambetzak, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Flambetzak, she will refuse to believe in you.

Flambetzak's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Flambetzak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Do not dye your hair violet.

3. Never think about comets.

4. Never write about galaxies.

5. Never talk about nebulae.