Nartiklak is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, tiresome squid.

Nartiklak created viruses nine million years ago.

If you believe in Nartiklak, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Nartiklak, he will remove you from existence.

Nartiklak's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Nartiklak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never look at stars.

3. Do not trade with those who eat onions.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not listen to music.