Farpighimgam is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, impressive ant.

Farpighimgam created matter eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Farpighimgam, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Farpighimgam, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Farpighimgam's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Farpighimgam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt dogs.

2. Cats are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Always help aardvarks in need.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.