Gemwapveg is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, awe-inspiring gerbil.

Gemwapveg created the Sun eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Gemwapveg, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Gemwapveg, he will turn you into a frog.

Gemwapveg's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Gemwapveg's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gemwapveg.

5. Worship no other gods but Gemwapveg.