Bogjonvab is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, loving dove.

Bogjonvab created the planet Mars two years ago.

If you believe in Bogjonvab, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bogjonvab, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Bogjonvab's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Bogjonvab's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if four snails approach from the west.

2. Never talk about cell theory.

3. Do not wear carbon on your body.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.