Kemnigyog is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, confident hummingbird.

Kemnigyog created oxygen five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kemnigyog, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Kemnigyog, he will be very unhappy.

Kemnigyog's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Kemnigyog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill porpoises.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never eat figs.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.