Tanrakmipwotvabjipbad is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, self-confident cat.

Tanrakmipwotvabjipbad created the world eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tanrakmipwotvabjipbad, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tanrakmipwotvabjipbad, he will turn you into a duck.

Tanrakmipwotvabjipbad's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Tanrakmipwotvabjipbad's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Always help turtles.

3. Erect a large tin sculpture of Tanrakmipwotvabjipbad on top of all buildings.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tanrakmipwotvabjipbad.

5. Never pour water over plants.