Pakhundoss is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, astonishing chinchilla.

Pakhundoss created a bottom quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pakhundoss, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Pakhundoss, it will refuse to believe in you.

Pakhundoss' most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Pakhundoss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Always help mites in need.

4. Never feed cucumbers to monkeys while wearing fawn corsets.

5. Never bounce in holy places.