Joprullxen is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, boastful clam.

Joprullxen created the planet Saturn four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Joprullxen, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Joprullxen, it will turn you into a sheep.

Joprullxen's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Joprullxen's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Joprullxen on top of all buildings.

2. Hide if four badgers approach from the south.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Joprullxen.

4. Always make sure there are no snails in a building before entering it.

5. Worship no other gods but Joprullxen.