Begwadyam is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, emotional zebra.

Begwadyam created the cosmos seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Begwadyam, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Begwadyam, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Begwadyam's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Begwadyam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Always obey Begwadyam's priests.

5. Do not drink alcohol.