Jigmatyat is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, awesome fly.

Jigmatyat created humanity nine million years ago.

If you believe in Jigmatyat, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Jigmatyat, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Jigmatyat's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Jigmatyat's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never wear hats.

4. You must love Jigmatyat.

5. Never look in ponds.