Pakbomnut is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, happy porpoise.

Pakbomnut created oxygen two years ago.

If you believe in Pakbomnut, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Pakbomnut, he will have a low opinion of you.

Pakbomnut's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Pakbomnut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Pakbomnut's name in vain.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always make sure there are no voles in a room before entering it.

5. Do not chop down trees.