Capyogbeg is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, unselfish lobster.

Capyogbeg created energy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Capyogbeg, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Capyogbeg, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Capyogbeg's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Capyogbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never laugh near aardvarks.

3. Never look at galaxies.

4. Always wear black.

5. Always help otters in need.