Dogtamingstik is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, kind warg.

Dogtamingstik created dark energy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dogtamingstik, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Dogtamingstik, he will strike you with lightening.

Dogtamingstik's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Dogtamingstik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Dogtamingstik on top of all buildings.

4. Do not kill sharks.

5. Always obey Dogtamingstik's priests.