Kaplibpoddib Tailkiptap is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, egotistical fish.

Kaplibpoddib Tailkiptap created a photon three million years ago.

If you believe in Kaplibpoddib Tailkiptap, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Kaplibpoddib Tailkiptap, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Kaplibpoddib Tailkiptap's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Kaplibpoddib Tailkiptap's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Kaplibpoddib Tailkiptap.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Hide if five ducks approach from the north.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never think about gravity.