Lenlantaf is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, self-confident walrus.

Lenlantaf created a photon twelve years ago.

If you believe in Lenlantaf, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Lenlantaf, he will come to you in dreams.

Lenlantaf's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Lenlantaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Never paint your neck indigo.

5. Worship no other gods but Lenlantaf.