Zakhanfet is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, happy lobster.

Zakhanfet created the planet Jupiter seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zakhanfet, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Zakhanfet, it will turn you into a plant.

Zakhanfet's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Zakhanfet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Always look after injured nematodes.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Worship no other gods but Zakhanfet.