Bonklarnabpadflis is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, clever porpoise.

Bonklarnabpadflis created the Tadpole Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonklarnabpadflis, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bonklarnabpadflis, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Bonklarnabpadflis' most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Bonklarnabpadflis' Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never hurt geese.

4. Do not wear gold on your body.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.