Betomthud is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, fussy hedgehog.

Betomthud created the solar system three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Betomthud, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Betomthud, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Betomthud's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Betomthud's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured seals.

2. Betomthud must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never talk about mites.

4. Always help gulls.

5. Pray towards the south.