Vabwegfud is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, slow lizard.

Vabwegfud created humankind seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vabwegfud, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Vabwegfud, it will turn you into a snail.

Vabwegfud's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Vabwegfud's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moths.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.