Pigcatbud is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, ill-tempered snail.

Pigcatbud created a strange quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Pigcatbud, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Pigcatbud, it will refuse to believe in you.

Pigcatbud's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Pigcatbud's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in holy places.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate gulls.

3. Always help doves in need.

4. Do not kill sharks.

5. Never mention horses.