Ganjamhap is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, sapient gorilla.

Ganjamhap created silver two million years ago.

If you believe in Ganjamhap, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Ganjamhap, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Ganjamhap's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Ganjamhap's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Never wear white dresses.

3. Never talk about tapirs.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.