Dabfunlad Sakhenxem is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, contented grasshopper.

Dabfunlad Sakhenxem created the Small Magellanic Cloud six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dabfunlad Sakhenxem, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Dabfunlad Sakhenxem, she will be very unhappy.

Dabfunlad Sakhenxem's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Dabfunlad Sakhenxem's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick doves.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dabfunlad Sakhenxem.

3. You must never eat bananas.

4. Do not dye your hair indigo.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.