Vedpanveen is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, flying pig.

Vedpanveen created the Sunflower Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vedpanveen, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Vedpanveen, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Vedpanveen's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Vedpanveen's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Hide from mauve hamsters for they are unholy.

4. Vedpanveen must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never eat bark.