Nellhigcem is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, witless wombat.

Nellhigcem created the planet Saturn three million years ago.

If you believe in Nellhigcem, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Nellhigcem, he will manifest in front of you.

Nellhigcem's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Nellhigcem's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Erect nine aluminium sculptures of Nellhigcem on top of important buildings.

3. Never talk about black holes.

4. Do not wear blue clothing.

5. Never look in ponds.