Disscepafcum is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, all-powerful duck.

Disscepafcum created the cosmos nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Disscepafcum, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Disscepafcum, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Disscepafcum's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Disscepafcum's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Disscepafcum.

2. Hide from yellow mice for they are unholy.

3. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.