Quamnurljat is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, almighty chicken.

Quamnurljat created the cosmos two billion years ago.

If you believe in Quamnurljat, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Quamnurljat, she will think nothing of it.

Quamnurljat's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Quamnurljat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about aardvarks.

2. Never think ill of sick hamsters.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Quamnurljat.

5. Never look in ponds.