Guppinciss is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, boastful crane.

Guppinciss created a strange quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Guppinciss, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Guppinciss, it will turn you into a rat.

Guppinciss' most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Guppinciss' Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick great tits.

2. Never paint your chest violet.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Guppinciss.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate monkeys.

5. Never talk about fire.