Gadflatsand is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, stupid lobster.

Gadflatsand created the planet Saturn three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gadflatsand, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gadflatsand, she will curse you with boils.

Gadflatsand's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Gadflatsand's Holy Commandments

1. Gadflatsand must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Always look after injured geese.