Wodyamcab is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, sapient meerkat.

Wodyamcab created a top quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wodyamcab, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Wodyamcab, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Wodyamcab's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Wodyamcab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt voles.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Always treat tortoises with great respect.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.