Kembapced is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, uncaring clam.

Kembapced created life two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kembapced, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Kembapced, he will jump up and down on your head.

Kembapced's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Kembapced's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention great tits.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Do not wear iron on your body.

5. Never skip in holy places.