Wikjarnrul is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, witty pigeon.

Wikjarnrul created a down quark four years ago.

If you believe in Wikjarnrul, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Wikjarnrul, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Wikjarnrul's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Wikjarnrul's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Wikjarnrul.

4. You must pray to Wikjarnrul six times a day.

5. Never feed spinach to voles while wearing gray shirts.