Zobzustbim is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, strong dove.

Zobzustbim created the Sun three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zobzustbim, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Zobzustbim, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Zobzustbim's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Zobzustbim's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Do not wear silver on your body.

3. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Zobzustbim loves grasshopers, so they must be honoured.

5. Always help turtles in need.