Saghasbumnegsakdin is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, resourceful beaver.

Saghasbumnegsakdin created Asia nine million years ago.

If you believe in Saghasbumnegsakdin, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Saghasbumnegsakdin, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Saghasbumnegsakdin's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Saghasbumnegsakdin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about onions.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.