Cutlabfutgidkemlidpanstig is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, egotistical chinchilla.

Cutlabfutgidkemlidpanstig created the planet Venus five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cutlabfutgidkemlidpanstig, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Cutlabfutgidkemlidpanstig, she will be very unhappy.

Cutlabfutgidkemlidpanstig's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Cutlabfutgidkemlidpanstig's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Cutlabfutgidkemlidpanstig.

2. Cutlabfutgidkemlidpanstig loves moths, so they must be respected.

3. Never go into violet rooms.

4. Always wear blue.

5. Run away if eight mites approach from the west.