Cebbasstin Gudcapwig Ditlargquim is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, self-assured mongoose.

Cebbasstin Gudcapwig Ditlargquim created the Small Magellanic Cloud six billion years ago.

If you believe in Cebbasstin Gudcapwig Ditlargquim, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Cebbasstin Gudcapwig Ditlargquim, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Cebbasstin Gudcapwig Ditlargquim's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Cebbasstin Gudcapwig Ditlargquim's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick dolphins.

2. Never paint your hands indigo.

3. Never bounce in the presence of birds.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Always obey Cebbasstin Gudcapwig Ditlargquim's priests.