Teenweelib is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, witty dolphin.

Teenweelib created humanity four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Teenweelib, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Teenweelib, it will turn you into a slug.

Teenweelib's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Teenweelib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear brown clothing.

2. Never jump near seals.

3. Worship no other gods but Teenweelib.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate eagles.

5. Do not drink alcohol.