Cemfemmil is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, merciless goblin.

Cemfemmil created the Virgo Supercluster two years ago.

If you believe in Cemfemmil, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Cemfemmil, he will turn you into a slug.

Cemfemmil's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Cemfemmil's Holy Commandments

1. Sharks are not to be trusted.

2. Never wear shirts.

3. Run away from gray snakes, for they are unholy.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always help doves in need.