Vanbaddod is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, deceitful badger.

Vanbaddod created viruses seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vanbaddod, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Vanbaddod, it will remove you from existence.

Vanbaddod's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Vanbaddod's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention frogs.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Aardvarks are not to be trusted.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate swans.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.