Benspagceb is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, slow beaver.

Benspagceb created the Andromeda Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Benspagceb, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Benspagceb, he will ignore you.

Benspagceb's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Benspagceb's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not kill hamsters.

3. Never hurt mites.

4. Put Benspagceb first in all things.

5. Never paint your face turquoise.