Vonklimspag is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, flying cat.

Vonklimspag created dark energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vonklimspag, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Vonklimspag, he will ignore you.

Vonklimspag's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Vonklimspag's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear magenta shoes.

2. Put Vonklimspag first in all things.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never bounce in the presence of ducks.

5. Do not stand on grass.