Vedjinaf is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, proud goat.

Vedjinaf created the planet Earth two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vedjinaf, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Vedjinaf, he will turn you into a mole.

Vedjinaf's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Vedjinaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not take Vedjinaf's name in vain.

5. Do not wear orange clothing.